Mommy can’t sleep so she’s rambling

My late night rambles

It’s now 4:03 am and here I sit, exhausted, but can’t sleep.  I often wonder what it would be like to be able to a good nights sleep.  At least 8 hours, able to lay down and sleep like my better half, at 9 or 10 at night.  But still, sleep eludes me.  I know that, as a mother, this is a commonality, and for those even who aren’t mothers yet.  I know that my depression and anxiety makes me this way, but I am helpless to overcome this last obstacle.  I guess for me, I am just doomed to live my life, exhausted and alone most nights.  Yes, I know.. I just said alone.  I sit, night after night, in a house full of my family and yet still somehow feel so alone.  My husband is within an arms reach away, the 2 of us separated only by our 2 year old sleeping peacefully.

I should take solace in the fact that my children are able to sleep peacefully, quite soundly, actually.  Yes, they are just like their father.  Which brings me to my next point.  How many of you have a very “noisy” partner?  I swear mine could raise the roof… and yes, our children are following in his footsteps.  They are all very noisy sleepers.  Another reason why I very well may have problems sleeping.  And yet, it’s comforting.  Comforting to know that even though I can’t sleep, my loved ones are.. and they are very close to me.

So to pass the time this morning, I am watching one of my all time favorites, an oldie but a goodie.  It makes it easier to bear, when I can sit here and watch John Travolta, in his younger years of course!  At least when I finally am able to dose off, I will have sweet dreams. Wonderful dreams of dancing with my husband oh so many years ago, like we did before we had kids and actually had time and the money to go dancing.  Ah yes, the movie you ask?  Why, Urban Cowboy, of course!  Compliments of my subscription service.  So, while we’re here, why don’t you drop me a line and let me know what YOUR favorite movie is!

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